The nighttime is both a blessing and a curse for someone like me. For a lot of others too, from what I can tell. There is beauty in the night, a haunting stillness that makes the world so much easier to appreciate. Have you ever wandered the streets of a quiet suburb at 3am on a weeknight? Utter stillness. It's as though the entire world has entered slumber and I'm the only one able to see the beauty of it all. Especially in the rain. Street lights reflecting in the droplets, mirrored images marred by ripples in the puddles on the sidewalk. Trees heavy with moisture, drooping and unloading their burdens without a moment's warning (ifyouknowwhatimean.jpg).
However, sometimes the stillness is too much and morphs to loneliness. Lying alone, awake, in a huge bed with naught but electronics for company. Nights like these drag on. The flesh is weary, but the mind is racing at light speed. Happy, sad, and everything in between meld together, emotions tangling like the threads pulling away from my silken sheets. The thoughts aren't always bad (though quite often they are), but the sheer volume of them becomes overwhelming until I can't even follow my own train of thought. And once the medication kicks in, oh my... The words that flow forth become nonsensical babbling, bordering on thinking in tongues. The sentences have proper structure and grammar, but the words are all wrong. Trying to give an example is hard, but I'll attempt it: "Today you must proceed to the elephant in order to television the camel before it's too journal."
Thankfully, through the wisdom of myself and others, I managed to combat the bad thoughts. Hopefully it helps combat the nightmares. If only for a night.
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